Oh my gosh, people, our Governor has lost it. Maybe he never had it. I can’t quit watching. I cannot figure the man out. His hair, his lawyers who keep quitting, and his cowboy movie stories. What is going on? Last week he was quoting Rudyard Kipling and this week he is just making shit up! I don’t know. I do know we are living in some wierdo times. The news is really getting strange, but the good thing is at least we have a good man in charge. Sheesh.

So, onto the snaps! The top picture is what snaps look like today. I hate that font. I seriously HATE all of the fonts on that package. It represents everything that disgusts me with society. I have begun collecting vintage packages from thrift stores to quiet my inner hate. Imagine when we were a country that hired illustrators to design, by hand, these beautiful cards. Now we have puked out computer guts on a card that should get a big F- in  it’s design elements class. Idiots, you are all settling for this! We are all settling for mediocracy!

This is a Dritz package, when Dritz was all cool and diamondy!

 

This is Delong and it would NEVER rust !!

Starsnaps are for fancy ladies!

Oh Vogue, you snappy Art Deco snap, you!

Oh, Eversnap, so ovaly and brother to Everclear, we love your design!

This is the Prym, from the Eighties, the beginning of our descent!

Demand the return, the return of the noble product packaging!

Even Woolco was great. Electric Kool-Aid Acid/Colorblind testing cool!

Even Bonita, was so well, Bonita!

And my favorite, the Clinton Snap Fasteners, all blue-printy and great!

You see, people used to have these things called skills. And skills were things that one went to school to learn. 18 year old kids, sat hungover, at desks, with rulers, meticulously learning to make fonts, and responsibly use the formal elements of design. And now, well now, sigh, now we have all settled for crap and a total wack-a-doo governor. Save us President Obama, before it is too late!